Taco Bell - Chicken Grilled Stuft Burrito

Taco Bell trek gets Stuft! That's right, 'Stuft!'  It's how you know they're hip.  This burrito is Taco Bell's second highest in caloric content, bested only by the beef version of the Grilled Stuft Burrito.  Daniel's go-to Taco Bell food, his opinion was preordained.  Ben eats it and hates that he likes it, kind of like a baby who's mad at his butthole because it hurts when he poops.  The idea of the Burrito Casserole raises it's ugly head again, this time horrifically solidified a bit more.  It cometh, the Burrsserole, like some herald of Armageddon.

Ingredients - "A large, warm, soft flour tortilla wrapped around grilled, marinated all-white-meat chicken, hearty beans, seasoned rice, a blend of three real cheeses – cheddar, pepper jack and mozzarella – creamy pepper jack sauce, and fiesta salsa, then grilled to perfection."

Ratings:
Ben - Getting a 1% raise.  At first it seems like it sucks, but then, it's a raise, but still kind of sad.  This is really a good thing?  But I'm angry that I'm happy at it.
Daniel - Skunk Ape. In the swamps of Florida there is a bigfoot, and that bigfoot is the Skunk Ape.  The ingredients in this burrito are cryptic, much like the cryptid that is a the Skunk Ape.

BQ3 - Episode Ten
"This Is The Best Burrito I've Ever Eaten" by Parry Gripp, used with permission.  http://parrygripp.com/ 

Nellie's - Green Chile Banado

Nellie's, finally.  Nellie's is a family-owned Mexican food place that is popular enough that over the years they have actually trimmed their hours so that they are only open until 2pm.  In addition they regularly just shut down for two weeks at a shot for both Xmas and Summer Vacation.  None of this impacts the crowds of people one will regularly see waiting outside in the hot sun every day around lunch.  In fact, this is one of the restaurants that emboldened us to embark on Lunch Trek in the first place.  They do make a pretty good burrito.  Sage and Amy join us; Sage as a quester, Amy as a rolled taco eater.  Daniel could have asked his brother for a recommendation from Nellie's, but that would have been what we got anyway, so...  There is much discussion about the Rapture, and whether this episode would indeed have ever been heard.  Given the tardiness of this posting, the fears were justified.

Ingredients - Green Chile, Pork, and Cheese

Ratings:
Ben - Going to the movies, I never really want to go out of my way to go to the movies, but then I think 'I can get popcorms there.'  And then when I'm at the movies it's fun and I wonder why I don't do it more often.
Daniel - Riding really fast on your bicycle as a kid, it's really fun.  You feel awesome, and your a kid, and you're like 'Check me out!'
Sage - About 2 beers, I'm a little burrito drunk.  Got a good burruzz on.

BQ3 - Episode Nine
"This Is The Best Burrito I've Ever Eaten" by Parry Gripp, used with permission.  http://parrygripp.com/ 

Pepper's - Chimichanga Con Queso

Pepper's is the front end cafe (read: less fancy) for what is likely the most expensive restaurant in Las Cruces; The Double Eagle.  A true chimichanga, in all its fried glory, one would expect exceptional quality given the outrageous price of this burrito.  One would be disappointed.  We certainly were.  It wasn't a bad burrito, so much as thoroughly unexceptional.  We even try to dumb it down to our blue collar standards by ordering it with Seasoned Taco Beef.  This only reminded us how far from Taco Bell we had traveled.  Also, we must have blown our load the past weekend with so many guests on the quest, as we sound generally drained and dull through much of the recording.  Amy joins us with a burger and fries from the same establishment, and they turn out to be even worse than the chimichanga.  Ben continues to eat vegetarian, Burrito Quest notwithstanding.  Daniel worries about likely running out of burrito establishments in Mesilla sooner than expected.

Ingredients: "Seasoned Chicken Breast, Slow Roasted Beef or Seasoned Taco Beef laced with Chile Con Queso then stuffed into a crispy flour tortilla, served with Pico De Gallo"

Ratings:
Ben - Making a joke about something being retarded, and then realizing there is a retarded person there.  The joke is probably pretty funny, but it ends up pissing someone off.
Daniel - When your infants only wake up once, and briefly, during the night, but after that one time you can't get back to sleep.  Just like last night.

BQ3 - Episode Eight
"This Is The Best Burrito I've Ever Eaten" by Parry Gripp, used with permission.  http://parrygripp.com/ 

Taco Bell - Half-Pound Cheesy Potato Burrito

Late night Questing achieved!  We stay up late and eat Taco Bell outside of some kind of house party on the back of a random car.  Joined (officially) by Isaac, Sage, and Charles (or Bubblegum), it is our biggest cast in some time.  Isaac is drunk.  Sage wanders off at one point, when a car drives by, to talk to some chicks.  Ben is roundly, and unfairly, or at least inaccurately, labeled a racist over and over.  Daniel tries to keep things on track, even speed things up a bit when a neighbor's porch light illuminates.  Charles comes out with a solid rating his first time at bat.  Various other hangers on spout comments and drunkenly ask for our food.

Ingredients: "A warm, soft flour tortilla loaded with a double portion** of seasoned ground beef and filled with crispy potato bites, warm nacho cheese sauce, and reduced fat sour cream."  **Double beef compared to Burrito Supreme®.

Ratings:
Ben - Dogs digging, they're just having a good old time and don't know they're destroying property.
Daniel -  Fresh-cut grass under my feet, it feels good on my feet, but then I'm also allergic to grass.
Isaac - Rollerblades or skateboard, where you look at someone doing it and say "That looks like a great time" but you try it and find out it's a lot harder than it looks.
Sage - Ben's racism, it's something that you don't really want all the time but occasionally you get some and it's really awesome.
Charles - Scratchy beard, you like having a beard but you scratch at it all the time.

BQ3 - Episode Seven
"This Is The Best Burrito I've Ever Eaten" by Parry Gripp, used with permission.  http://parrygripp.com/ 

Chicharron-Off: Las Trancas v Mi Pueblito

A challenge was extended, a challenge we accepted most lustily.  Someone commented on Facebook that Mi Pueblito had a good chicharron burrito.  Not wanting Las Trancas' reputation to be sullied, we felt it our duty to put paid to this assertion.  So, with Sage in town (and Sarah in tow, but declining the chicharron-off) we chowed down on chicharron burritos from each; a veritable gastronomic battle royale.  The surprising result: Mi Pueblito edges past by a nose.  Turns out Mi Pueblito puts green chile in theirs, and we got red chile on the Las Trancas because that's what we knew.  This makes the comparison a bit uneven, but it also ended up being the only deciding point between them.  Good texture and flavor from both, so really everyone wins.  Ben explains his previous apparent insensitivity to the certain races.  Daniel momentarily loses his mind and asks Ben who is cooler, Batman or Robin?  He quickly retracts his idiotic question.  Sage suggests questing whilst surrounded by nerds.  Amy had specific instructions for her burrito, which Daniel completely disregards.

Ingredients: Las Trancas - Chicharrones, Red Chile, Refried Beans, and Cheese; Mi Pueblito - Chicharrones, Green Chile, Refried Beans, and Cheese

Ratings:
Ben - Las Trancas: The red chile is Robin, but after he stops being a bitch, like after he turns into Nightwing. Mi Pueblito: The green chile is the Batman.
Daniel - Las Trancas: A stinky blue cheese, good sometimes but very rich; Mi Pueblito: A delicious Irish cheddar, good anytime and all the time.
Sage - Las Trancas: 3rd Edition D&D, it's kind of all over the place but sometimes those extra bits sometimes are appealing.  Mi Pueblito: 4th Edition D&D, it's a little better made but occasionally doesn't appeal as much.
Amy - I hope I don't spend the rest of the afternoon in the bathroom.

BQ3 - Episode Six
"This Is The Best Burrito I've Ever Eaten" by Parry Gripp, used with permission.  http://parrygripp.com/